Aphrodite is the goddess of love, and is unique among the goddess archetypes in that she has both a focused awareness like the ‘virgin’ goddesses and also a diffuse awareness like the ‘vulnerable’ goddesses Although Aphrodite does represent erotic love, she also embodies so much more. She is the alchemist goddesses that has the power to turn base objects into things of beauty. Whatever she turns her attention towards can transform and grow into the highest version of itself, and her power to bring the best out of people can be magnetic.
Aphrodite is like a muse, she supports the creative spark, helps people to develop their visions, and inspires growth and activity. When she focuses her attention on someone she makes them feel loved, expanded and fascinating. This is the way she relates to people, and those who have enjoyed her intimate attentions can feel rejected or even angry when she moves her sights onto something else. This is the Aphrodite woman’s way, which can be misunderstood as flirtatiousness or a sexual invitation. Sometimes this may be the case, but there is a lot more to this archetype than her sexuality.
The Aphrodite woman is attractive in that she has a personal magnetism about her. People are drawn to her charisma and she has a unique ability to draw people out of themselves and make them feel special. She is not competitive or jealous, but has a genuine interest in people and things, giving them her full transformational attention, before passing onto the next exciting experience.
The Aphrodite Character
Vision holder: The Aphrodite woman is a fantastic vision holder for other people’s dreams. She is able to understand people’s ideas, join them on the creative journey, and provide nourishment and rejuvenation on their long and otherwise lonely paths. Many successful people have an Aphrodite woman to thank for holding their vision with them.
Alchemist: The Aphrodite woman has a Pigmalion effect, where her positive expectations are able to transform ordinary ideas or people into the highest expressions of themselves. This gives her an alchemists ability to transform others through love and creativity.
Lover: The Aphrodite woman falls in love easily and often, she feels transformed by love, and she transforms the object of her love. This is a natural and beautiful thing, but patriarchal religions and cultures have lowered this image into that of the temptress or prostitute. An Aphrodite woman can then be made to feel immoral or at odds with society for wishing to express her natural inclination towards love and sensuality. It also reduces the more divine aspects of this love to it’s baser element, that once cut off from the ideal becomes empty and meaningless. This representation of the Aphrodite woman lowers her self-esteem, and will eventually leave her feeling disconnected and cut off from her true power.
Denial: If an Aphrodite woman is brought up in family that looks down on sexuality then she may try to deny this aspect of herself. She may play down her attractiveness, and repress her sexual feelings which can lead to anxiety and guilt. If she does succeed in shutting off this part of her psyche then she will loose the profound joy and creativity that this archetype gifts her.
Doesn’t think of the consequences: The Aphrodite woman is highly spontaneous and always follows her heart. Because of her intense focus on the present moment this can make her forget or ignore the consequences of her actions. She may habitually stand people up if she gets a better offer, and take risks without thinking. By seeing these patterns that cause herself and others pain, she is able to change her behaviour and consider which course of action to take.
Broken hearts: The Aphrodite woman falls in love honestly and often, each time believing that this is the one. when it turns out not to be she leaves a wake of dejected lovers who may feel wounded or even angry. To overcome this cycle she must learn to accept the human frailties in her partners, and stay in a relationship long enough to develop a lasting connection.
The destructive side of love: The godddess Aphrodite was aware of the suffering that love could cause and often used it as a weapon. Women under the influence of Aphrodite experience this when they fall in love with the wrong people, or those who don’t return their love. This may give rise to destructive behaviours that risk destroying other areas of their life, and their self-esteem. To overcome this the woman must look honestly at the relationship and how it is effecting her. She may need to cut all ties with that person and move on, finding a true connection with another more appropriate person who can return her affections.
Women: Aphrodite women often enjoy a wide group of friends who either share her qualities or like to hear of her exciting escapades. Some women especially Hera may find her behaviour around men threatening and try to exclude her. The Aphrodite woman is not jealous herself so may find her effect on some women confusing.
Partners: The Aphrodite woman wants to experience life in its abundance, and so may enjoy relationships with both men and women. She chooses partners that are not necessarily good for her, and may go for moody, creative and passionate types. They are often unreliable, and reflect her wild nature.
Work: The Aphrodite woman seeks work that holds some emotional appeal for her, wether its full of drama, creativity, or around people that inspire her. She doesn’t like repetitive tasks, and would rather do something she loves for less money. She is driven by the search for new experiences rather than the need to achieve.
Sexuality: The Aphrodite woman enjoys a varied sex life, always driven by new experiences and exploring the unknown. She likely loves sharing these tales with others, and always has an outrageous story to tell.
Marriage: Long term unions are difficult for the Aphrodite woman who thrives on new experiences. Unless other goddess archetypes are activated she will likely enjoy a series of relationships rather than settle down with one man.
Children: Aphrodite women can make fantastic mothers. They have a wonderful ability to bring out the talents in children and make them feel special and accepted. Children are drawn to their magnetic characters and will look up to their Aphrodite mothers like glamorous goddesses. However, her tendency to giver her undivided attention one minute, and then move on the next can have negative effects on her children. She must become aware of this and remember that children need consistency and safety to grow up well adapted. If she keeps this in mind she will be an excellent mother.
Child: Young Aphrodite’s’ are usually very outgoing and love to be centre of attention. They enjoy interacting with people and are bold in their directness. She likes to dress up in pretty clothes and is aware of the effect she has on people, being able to get what she wants and also giving much of herself.
Adolescent and young adult: During this time a latent sexuality begins to emerge and the young Aphrodite may find herself at the centre of much attention. She must be careful during this time to take precautions and make sure that her head is involved with the decisions of her heart. Serial relationships or sexual promiscuity can negatively effect her self esteem and reputation.
She may find self expression in a subject of the arts, through which she can channel her creative and sexual power. Her womanhood will likely be exciting and passionate, as she moves from one project to another. If she spends this time involved in creative works then this will be very rewarding for her sense of self and later life. Love affairs are interesting, but because she is often drawn to unconventional men these may be fleeting and leave her with little to hold onto once the passion has spent itself.
Mid-life: If the Aphrodite woman has spent much of her life focusing on her looks, then this can be a difficult time. As her beauty fades she may find that she is unable to focus on others as much, and instead turns inwards, fearing her loss of ‘self’. She may not realise that it was her magnetic character that attracted people to her rather than her looks. If she spent her previous years engaged with creative pursuits then she will find her mid-life as rewarding and passionate as before. She may find that she wants to settle down, and begin looking for someone other than the men she usually goes for.
Later life: Some Aphrodite women retain their grace and passion throughout their lives, moving from each experience to the next, always fascinated by the colourful people and projects they meet along the way. They have friends from all walks of life, and live each moment fully until the end.
Rooting your Inner Aphrodite
Acceptance: The tendency to fall in love easily and enjoy a high sex drive can lead to guilt and repression. Especially when comparing yourself to other women that may not share the same drives. Learning about her goddess archetype helps the Aphrodite woman, to understand who she is and accept herself and the gifts this archetypes brings.
Sort and separate: Being fascinated by everything can be difficult for the Aphrodite woman, and for her to be able to function happily in the world, some prioritisation is needed. This is an honest inward task of sorting through your values, motives, and feelings, to understand what is really important to you and what needs your attention next. By doing this you can be sure that your actions result from your true inner feelings and not from getting caught up in the moment and forgetting about what really matters.
Power: The Aphrodite woman is open and trusting, and can easily become hurt in the world of competition. This is a reminder to protect yourself and go slowly in your quest for power. Resist the temptation to become disillusioned by the world, and make sure you enjoy regular breaks to immerse yourself in creative projects and the people who are close to you.
Regular emotional distance: The Aphrodite woman loves to become fully immersed in the people she is attracted to. But this can make it difficult to notice negative patterns and behaviours and she may stay in a damaging situation or relationship longer than is good for her. Getting some emotional distance every now and then is a great way to see the relationship from ‘up high’, and notice any areas where things are going wrong or need some attention. This is an excellent practice to get into, and may require a physical holiday from the relationship for a few days.
Choose for yourself: The Aphrodite woman’s world is full of relationships, interesting people, projects, events and erotic desires. With so much going on it is easy to get lost in all the excitement. Because of your magnetism people may want too much from you and you can easily become drained. It’s important for you to exercise choice and ask ‘is this what I really want’ and ‘do I have the energy for this right now’.
By taking the time to think things through and choose for yourself you can be sure that you are directing your own life, and not just reacting to peoples needs or desires for you. Everyone will want to bathe in your unique Aphrodite consciousness, but that doesn’t mean that you have to respond every time or burn yourself up in the process. Decide what’s truly important to you what makes YOUR heart sing; and follow that path. You can still stop to smell the roses along the way, but keeping centred helps you stay on track.
Movement: The Aphrodite woman is very much in touch with her body and sensual side. Anything that involves dancing, stretching, flexibility, or sensuality is perfect., and exercising with a partner is also lots of fun. You could try learning a type of dance, like salsa, belly dancing, pole dancing, or try something more inward seeking, such as yoga, tai chi or qigong. These are especially good for building inner strength and energy, which creates balance because you tend to give a lot of yourself.
Nourishment: The Aphrodite woman loves the sensual aspect of food. Embrace this by making colourful smoothies and plates of fresh fruits and vegetables. Take your time on the preparation, making them a thing of beauty to nourish the mind and soul as well as the body.
Gifts: Your gifts are creating growth, inspiration and transformation in anything you set your attention on, whether it’s a person, object or event. You are an alchemist in the sense that you can turn something base into something beautiful, bringing out it’s inner uniqueness and essence. You inspire love and celebrate relationships wherever you go.
Your wound is that our patriarchal culture has both vilified and exploited the sensual feminine. The Aphrodite woman is now portrayed as either immoral or a mere object for male gratification. This reduces your true status as unseen, and denies your deeper powers of creativity, alchemy and transformation. By standing in your power and refusing to be labelled by society you can reclaim your rightful place as goddess once again.